Mother's Day

BY CORDIE S.

The year my mom died, my hubby preached in an African-American church on Mother's Day. The custom is you wear a white flower if your mom is deceased and a red one if she is alive.

This church was passing out red and white carnations to all the mothers. I instinctively reached for a red one. After all, I had worn one for over 50 years. After the usher walked away, and I noticed my daughter's slightly puzzled face down the pew, it hit me! Mom is dead!

Duh!

So, I tried to get the usher's attention by tapping on someone's shoulder ahead of me. The usher returned, and I awkwardly whispered, "My mom died this year. May I swap and get a white carnation?" She smiled kindly, hugged me, handed me a white one and said, "keep both!"

As a tear trickled, I realized she was right. For although Mom was not here physically, she was alive in heaven, and her memory was fresh, or "alive" in my heart and mind.

She was "alive" when I cooked her sweet potato pie recipe, when I guffawed like she did at a good joke, when my sister sings solos, in my daughter's feisty retorts, in my dad's constant Alzheimer driven questioning, "Where's your Mother?" "Where's your Mother?" "Are you my wife?"

I miss her! I wish I had had the foresight to ask her how she handled the ravages of menopause, kick-butt arthritis, a child moving across country, or the loss of her mother. But I was focused on diapers and piano lessons, and homeschooling.

Unfortunately, the tyranny of the moment robbed me of a future perspective. . . of my forthcoming need to know!

Like Esau sold his birthright for a bowl of stew because his belly was empty (Genesis 25:29-34), I focused on filling a lot of temporary needs and didn't focus on future implications.

Yes, Mom and I had our spats and our short long-distance phone conversations when she tried to tell me how to raise my children or ...ahem, my husband. But, I still miss her.

So, if your Mom is still living, take the time to honor her and talk to her on Mother's Day.

This should be easy if you and your mom are Christians. You'll have no problems rising up and "calling her blessed." If you are away at school in finals, just a five minute call or FaceTime will make, or "refresh", her day! (Proverbs 25:25).

However, if you do not have the best relationship, at least send a card. Or send a text. Send something! Or for once, respond to HER text. Just say'in'.

There are no mistakes in God. He gave you to your mom for a reason - one that may take a lifetime for you to realize. So even if you don't have the best relationship at the moment, honor her as you are commanded to in Deut. 5:16.

Don't know what to say? Three words will do. "I love you." And if you ain't feeling it, two words. "Thank you!"

Cause if your Momma wasn't a Cruella de Vil . . .you owe her that much.

Cordie is a wonderful mother of two loving adult children.